Rain rain go away come again another day.

Why do you have to fucking rain on such a day when I have just release all my troubles and wanting to head off.

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Before I reached the finish line, I fell and hurt my back. It was so painful that I could only walk instead of running and jumping over the hurdle. I crippled to the finish line hoping everything would still be there at the same place. But the ending changed. I saw the drastic change of colours, that is not what I wanted initially.

So the colour changed, but I continued walking to get a bucket of paint and repaint it.
I can't now. The original painter was such an artiste that the painter can mix and colour well.
I can't do much.

I guess there are no more lies. All the truth came out at the last minute. The blows .
Tom will my heart ended up like yours?
or will time heal my wound with no scars at all ?

What to do? I still have to finish the race to know the final result. The winner is infront of me. If I keep walking I may still got the chance to win let me brace myself up. =)

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So the rain fell and it washes all my sins off.
hurray. sinless.

lies.
What are lies? Lies are things said which are not true.
So what are the difference between lies and white lies?

I do not know but I know white lies are reverse of lies; still not the truth but a lie which covers some parts of the lie. People have been telling tales or rather white lies to me. They made things so obvious that they are lying to me. I know it was okay as the lie was suppose to make me happy until i found out.

I remember Mr Koh (HOD mathematics in TWPS) once told the remedial classes of the batch 2002. White lies are frequently said, but white lies are actually lies which makes human happy instead of sad, just as long as the person doesn't find out about the lie. I thought about it until now and I guess yea it's true. The white lies do make people happy, nonethess do not let the person find out. It was funny though but think about it, quite true.

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Recently, I help a couple of friends in their problems and ended up demolishing my friendship with the others. Does this worth? I don't know, at least I know I made two people happy at least. As for the other friend, I talked nicely to it, but either ways it doesn't seems to understand what I was trying to relate. But what to do?

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I found out Euphonium section has been in trouble lately.
Reading from Priscilia and Frederick's blog I feel oh well.
If there is a senior in the section who only leave comments w/o hlpin then why is she/he call a senior?
I think you guys should relate it to your senior, bearing grudges will do no good to the section.
Our wish euphonium and trombone best section of the year right?
Let's kick clarinet off the shelf. haha. OOPX =X !

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What you hope may not be what you want. What you expect from one may not come true as well. Sometimes things like "I wish he would do this .. I wish she would do that.. "what makes you think that your wishes may come true? No doubt wishes and miracles could come true but I sure that the magical power does not accompany you all the time. There are 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 zillions or billions people out there. When it comes you are lucky man i tell you.

As you can see I changed my blogskins, the main idea is to let you know that you can find other colours in a dark cave instead of white. The reason to smile is that you are still colourful, my friends.

I found that these days I have been lacking behind a lot. Be it studies or what ever. I know now with sagara's teaching I can do the mathematics but sadly I don't understand. I asked myself, are these O lvls? Able to do without much understanding? Why integrate to get the area? The formula said so. The answer said so. The text said so. Haha. What an answer actually? I'm not saying sagara said this but I got this kind of answer frequently.

I know my mates have been banging hard on their design and technology work. I hope they can pull through. I'm working it at home as well. I got one more MC person with me. Jian Long. DA Vincians becareful arh!! Stop hurting yourself.

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Fight your way through the hurdles and fall. I will not expect you to pass any hurdles successfully. Watch the Olympics and you would know. Some athelete would drop some hurdles and some would fall. When they fell they know they can do it again and ran as fast as they could to over come those hurdles. When everything ended they may blame themselves for acheiving. But it's okay you have tried and millions have seen them.

When you do things acknowledge yourself. Why keep it to yourself. Maybe you want to keep the humble side of yourself but looking at the others steal your credits and climb that high? It's yours initially don't say "It's fate not mine liao" <-- what is this ?

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My blog is never clear. I don't want it to be a book. I want it to be a source where to think for why I said all these. =/

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I'm here yet you are dere. Will you come to me or will you go away as well? You chose to escape from whatever you see. You should know what you have seen and believe in them. I don't care if you want to compromise with me or not; I just want you to believe in yourself and walk the road that you have planned for yourself. You may choose to leave me and go far away, but whenever you raise your hand I would still be at the front hailing a cab and rush to you.

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anythin refer to violet's blog i lost to her.

I saw a few drama series of friends and I actually love it a lot. They taught me stuffs that actually happened in each of our friends live. Too bad I did not catch it earlier if not I would have watch many serials already.

Guys, stop coming to me and say, "My friends HOR, they share and talk secrets with one another and never tell me anything!" I'm sick and tired of it as I have already said many many times that friends they have their own capacity and space such that they could not possibly tell you what ever that had happened in their lives. Face it! Sometimes it is not your friends that they did not turn to you and not talk to you. Sometimes is that other people turn around and go to them and seek for help, it is not you actually that is in the fault.

Since you have all these problems, go and find stuffs which relaxes you. Music-ing, fighting, dancing, balling or even fucking.

First thing first is that, never ever comment about some one attitude unless you have walked in his or her shoe for one day. Perhaps, that person at that day has been irritated or annoyed and spout something which you don't like at all. So why blame one person for saying such things?

I can say I myself created sorrows for myself as in the friends part. You are not there anymore. What's the use of me being there? I'm sorry that I can't help at all. But i seriously hope that you would smile since you make the decision. I will be there,

for you,,

you've been quiet lately.
what happen? why did it happen?
is there something which makes you unhappy?
u feel lonely, u feel useless
but till now i still cant stand by ur side
what u want i cant possibly give u.
but wad i can give is not wad u want.

why is this happening? can u tell me ?

Taking things slow and steady has always been my motto since secondary 2. I know that if I rush things, the matter that I am into would never go well. It may go well if at the same time you took great care of the matter but who would take good care of stuffs that you want to finish it as soon as possible?

The healing process of my back can never be complete as this is what the doctor said but I want it to be fully recovered, I know it can, it just the matter of time. I wish and hope that the doctor would never tell such a thing to a sports person but it just came out, "NO SPORTS OR STRAINFUL EXERCISE THESE FEW YEARS!" I was like SHUT UP la.

Humans must and have to learn to take huge blows, maybe not many at one go but one or two for the start. NO SPORTS = to taking away my live, to be frank. I have been jumping around but I learnt my own mistake. I dropped down on my own accord and now I have to face the consequences.

I have asked for a pure and simple live but I did not make it that way. I twisted and turn it until so complicated that I myself do not understand it. Haha. What to do? But I like it this way. At least when I help the others and see them smile, I will smile myself. I never look too much upon me but I will look out for others. I don't know why, it's not good i can say.

Now with my back, I am cooped at home and I have to do homework which I can never get it right. The Amaths chapter 18B I don't know why I am wrong while I am following instructions. Or is my answer book wrong? Haha. Time to relax.. tata.

Heys, I'm bored and I hate holidays. Frankly speaking I never love holidays escept for the parts that I went out with my fellow mates.

Yesterday, Xiang Yun, Juan Ru and Min Jia came to my house and passed me something which I am touched upon seeing it. Let me show you, I've no scanner thus it aint the full picture of it.

aren't they nice. one more



Guess who did them up. Let me show you again.


haha. by this bunch of bananas of course.

If you see carefully there are two extra ppl. One columbian the other sec 1e-ian. But they filled my heart. nonetheless, they are .....
















ohh. wwad the hack cant allign them properly. so. it's Xiang Yi and Violet. Wakakas.

All of them are great. Is it my turn now to return them a letter? I wish I could but I'm simply speechless by what they have done for me.

What does all this show ? Little actions perks a little guy up. It's not the money the material that matters is your heart which matter the most.

i'm fine !!
now my back has a jewet brace on my back/
it's tight like a bra?

Neither things happen. Did I control my life or did I let my life controls me? Sometimes I think, if I control my life well, my life will be controlling me to make me happy. Okay I don't understand what am I trying to say but in my head it's clear.

I told one that I usually smoulder mud over myself so you guys couldn't see what I was doing then I found out that I am hurting myself. haha. My brother counselled a girl who cuts herself. Then something struck my mind, your heart is already in a terrible state and you are hurting your hand? Why let yourself feel the pain, or did someone inputs drug in the pen knife so you will get addicted to it? huh?

I went out with a primary school friend, Xin Ning. I thought there's nothing for us to talk as you know it's been like four years since we go out together. It was great going out. We cracked jokes out of everything. Her IQ jokes also make me laugh. This shows that we are clever. haha

For this route I have reached the end, and I clinched the third. I was not that happy but many were cheering for me and I think maybe I deserve it. After racing for so long and I got third it is utterly better then nothing. One burden off.

Out of so many racing only fifteen managed to get first. I guess I am one of the lucky lot to get third.

It started when we were younger, I still remember the fights and screams we did to each other. Although it was not pleasant at all but I think back it was silly. Now, girl, you have grown up and I really miss you. Tan Yen Sing. 912 is coming and I want to see you can ma? Put up a birthday celebration and all just to have a small gathering between us? Get a load off O lvl and celebrate and have fun all the way la. I miss you. Haha.

Fight the feeling, leave it alone. cause if it aint love, it just aint enough to leave a happy home. let's keep it friendly, you have to play fair.

3 SCHOOLS I WENT TO:
NUS childcare centre
Yuhua Primary
Teck Whye Primary / SEC

3 THINGS I PUT IN MY PURSE/BACKPACK:
moneys
cards
my girlfriend photos?

3 THINGS I DO WHEN I AM STRESSED:
Sing
Senile
Laugh

3 PLACES I GO ON A DAILY BASIS:
school
home
interchange

3 FAVOURITE FRUITS:
apples
pear
grapes

3 OF MY FAVOURITE FOODs:
dark chocolates
green apples
RICE

3 NAMES I GO BY: (in order of closeness)
don
donnod
jun wei

3 THINGS I'M WEARING RIGHT NOW:
polo tee
bermudas
underpants?

THE WHOS...

WHO IS IN THE HOUSE WITH ME:
ah ma. kor. mei. maid

WHO AM I THINKING OF RIGHT NOW:
to prevent some misunderstand i better nt say

WHO DID I LAST TALK ON THE PHONE WITH:
jian hui

WHO DID I SIT WITH DURING MY 5TH PERIOD CLASS:
SAGARA

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON I TOLD THAT I LOVED:
sagara

WHO DO I WISH I AM WITH RIGHT NOW:
VIOLET !!!

WHO GETS ON MY NERVES IN SCHOOL:
who ever talks to me when i just woke up frm my slp in class

THE WHERES...

WHERE IS MY PHONE:
my fone is on the table

WHERE DO I SLEEP:
comfy bed

WHERE IS THE LAST PLACE THAT I TOOK A RIDE TO:
Lot 1

THE WHATS...

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING I ATE:
rice?

WHAT CLOUR SHIRT AM I WEARING:
white

WHAT IS THE CLOSEST ITEM TO ME THAT IS BLUE:
CDs

WHAT DO I LIKE MOST ABOUT SCHOOL:
friends

WHAT IS MY FAVOURITE COLOUR:
black. brown. green

WHAT DO I WEAR OFTEN JEANS/SHORTS:
shorts

WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE I WATCHED:
CLICK

THE WHENS...

WHEN DID I START SCHOOL:
3

WHEN DID I LAST GO TO THE MALL:
10/8/2006

WHEN DID I LAST BURN SOMETHING:
haha. i burnt myself like yesterday?

3 PEOPLE TO DO THIS:
me, myself and don


I'm actually down down down with so many things that happen around me. I don't see that I care because I don't like to show too much of myself. Why should I show much of myself when I believe as friends you guys should slowly crept into me. Perhaps what I deduced was wrong, maybe I should go and interact more often. You are counted lucky if I interact with you cause I have never interact with people. I don't know why. I don't find the need but still I want to widen my social life.

Helping is part of my life. If one day you ask me to stop helping, it would be like snatching away your life partner from you. I know sometimes it really hurts seeing people who needs your help go down and you can't help much, but at least I stood there and listened.

Both of us clashed too much, perhaps as friends we should stand miles away. I have never expect anyone to trust me so much or rather trust me at all. I don't need all these, seriously. Doubt me, don't trust me. It's okay, it affected me greatly but what can I say? "Please don't be like that?" ohh please I will not ever say this. I never like to give someone a feeling that, he/she must be beside me all the time. Even though sometimes I like to say that, but I don't want the person to feel so great of himself/herself, thus I kept quiet.

In many of your lifes, I may have disappear long long time ago but when actually I'm still there at the line where we left. It may be difficult to turn a round and say, "Are we still friends?", but I would gladly say, "YES !!"

I found out that I'm one of a kind. A kind who doesn't know himself well enough. Undecisive I may be in the past, but now I would like to make a decision. "One cheese burger with extra pickles and a large fries, please." Haha. Not this kind of decision though. I know my own weaknesses and bad points like, I like to put myself at the top of everything. When I started to comment this and that, I then found out that NAH~~ this is not me at all how can I comment when I'm not that good.

I feel that, I need accompany. I need lots of it. I would feel uneasy if I want to talk to someone and I tried but to no avail that person kept talking to the other one. It feels terrible even more if you have forgotten what to say. From reader digest, it says that drinking coffee would lessen you Short Term Memory. Is it true or is it merely and advertisement which makes idiot like me go and buy the coffee. haha.

BUT SOMETIMES IT'S BETTER TO BE ALONE !!!

I yawned. I guess I better catch some sleep.

I ran as fast as I could when I see the finishing line. While I was running I heard, you bastard stop running and look here. I was being stupid and I took a glance. That incidence struck me to help, I got off the track and help but when I turn and look at the race, the race is over I'm the last. I never did regret that I lost in the race because I know I did a job in helping the people around me.

This quote caught me, "sometimes good guys need a break"
Since then I believe all of us should get a good nice break. All of us are good guys, unless you can single out the bad guys and why.

Many people want to die fast and I oppose to it straight away. I do not know how to convey myself but I think "Click" does it all for me. Click is a movie whereby it actually teaches you moral values with some comedy parts. It's one of the best movie I've watch this year?

It's been a long time since I laughed so hard.

I think I would start to LISTEN and believe to what you guys say. I will not only ask one person but many and approach the majority. "Great Mind Thinks A Like But Seldom Differ" So if all mind thinks a like then why not approach the majority. =)

I'm happy in my life now. No more fast forwarding.

Should I stand tall and wave, hide my face and wave or slouch and wave? Today, I stood tall and I can tell you I feel extremely great and of course I never cared anyone cheered or not cause I'm proud of myself. Maybe I am too full of myself. But if confidence is low can you stand tall and bow which makes you smile at the same time. You can never rehearse a smile on you face when you take a prize, you only can do it only when you think you won it all by hard work. Fear not, nobody will laugh at you, if they do they are jealous.

Jealousy fought through my life? Can anyone email me or write on the tag board why jealousy sucks. Jealousy in youself is one factor but why carried it out which makes everyone unhappy where friends can't even talk in school. I don't like the feeling at all, I want to do something to it.

My friends quarreled lately, and guess what he said, "I don't like him at the very first sight." HAHAHA! You're telling me this and you expect me to believe when you guys were as close as a family. Maybe you are being a big fat hypocrite? This doesn't affect me much as I've already told Jiale, Shuyi they all that everyone are hypocrites. I won't blame you but I want to know the root cause. If you find me a busybody, perhaps I would stand away.

If my move don't make you just wonder, what I got next for you?
What you wanna do?

Tomorrow is going to be a day where I go up on stage to get my Co-Curriculum Activity's Award. I don't deserve it, seriously. What exactly have I done for band? A lot? Not as much as those dedicated for band. I've created enough trouble and I get the award, should I thank god? But seriously, the award should be ripped away from me.

DRESS CODE
: Maroon Shirt
: Black Pants
: Events Manager Badge
: white bag

my oh my. where's don? i tink he is lost in the space out there. i couldnt find him is he dead or is he alive. he ate estacy or not? why for this second i see him sad and the the next second he is happy? so which is which? is he happy or is he sad? DON ar. come back to ur body. it needs a soul.

i nid u guys to hlp. i seriously nid. u guys one by one came and hlp. ur golden finger touched me. but i'm still at a bridge dunno whether to cross it or not. if i cross will i open and i topple down or will it be as smooth as a melting ice? i'm afraid and i truly am, i am afraid of many things which i can say.

i'm not tired of helping and letting obstacles come blocking in my way. i've learnt to turn the stubbling stone into a stepping stone. but will dere be a chance whr by i stand up and talk people wun treat as i'm talking rubbish. i noe some wont but many will. sometimes i feel that talking to a block of ice is better than talking to a bunch of people.

what ever i did all came to a joke. sometimes it's nt suppose to be but ended up it is. now ppl tot wad i wan is fame and what just because i say if i want to be something i wuld wan to be at the top. yea. unless u dare to say, u worked so hard is nt to be the best den u work so hard fer? might as well dun study and be the top in GCE o lvl.

i wun look back into time no mre. it aint hlp. looking back is just to prevent disputes frm happening again. hu will ever understand my this point? many still look back and say "don ar. he last time liddat liddat sia. why now i must treat him good?" why must u bring up unnecessary stuffs like the past? can u just kindly drop dem and move on? move on why stop at the finish line? u wuld nv see an athele stop at a finish line. once it passes the finish line it continue to run to the front but decelerating.

where's spirit in everyone that i admire? is it just a show when dere's an event. is it just a show put up? HELLO?? time to think for urself and work towards wad u want. be it dirty or clean. u urself happy = others happy. but fer me. others happy first den me la. =)

i dont noe wad to do alrdy. vomitting at others praising and bad points hab been my hobbies. can i just go forward and ask dem to shut up? i cant, no authority.

respect and responsibility is wad i aim to change the others towards deir fwens. but i found out it is onli due to me. sad huh? i cant change their personality. a leopard nv changes it spots. it's true.

can i shout out i love myself when i dunno whr am i?
lesbo. are we at the same boat?
i dun wan u to come with me.
hurting myself is enuf.
seeing ppl getting hurt with me is sucky.

anyone see this post.
just dun ask wad's wrng with me.
i dunno either.

back to one post shown onli.
if u missed any post use the archive.

I'm happy as well as sad. Both feelings came rushing into me, perhaps I have to learn to accept things which come and go instantly. Have you guys mastered the skill? Can you pass the instruction booklet to me?

I saw this Burger King advertisement and I found it rather interesting and I believe in it.

"You have the right to have what you want, exactly when you want it. Because on the menu of life, you are "Today's Special." And tommorrow's. And the day after that. And... Well. You get the drift. Yes that's right. We may be the king, but you my friend, are the almighty rules."

I don't wish to dwell much on the advertisement but I hope you know what I want to relate to you.

Each one have to believe in yourself. Please do not look down on the word believe. Though it's simple but once you try not to believe in yourself, who are you going to believe next?

One by one went down down down. Then are you going to take the elevator up or are you going to teleport up. Stop facing down have pride in yourself, I believe you have never see down look down and walk. Boosted with confidence.

=)
Sacrificed too much le. Time to let go, should i stop and start to think of myself? Have I been selfish? Have I not been tolerant enough? I cared and I ended tons of my friendship, nonetheless I'm happy.
SORRY TO THE PEOPLE WHOM I HAVE OFFENDED?

I don't care and I fuck care.
My piority, Jun Hao and Jian Hui. FULL STOP.

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I smiled daily. Da Vincians.. Found me hilarious? During recess I walked in with a foul mood and in class I'm hyper what am I man. Haha, what the hell.

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u made me smile and cry at the same time. i am so foolish to still stick on to u. u rejected me for her. u declared to me, "dun care fer me she dun like". from my appearance i may seem happy and happy always but sadly i weeped but do u noe? violet, shuyi and jiale knew. i wanted to hlp u and guide u along the way in teck whye secondary, u chose to walk urself. shld i follow u or shld i wait fer u to come back. u hab probs with ur fwens, so do i. ppl feel i dun aprreciate stuffs and i hab to do things to change their thinking. i'm losing my fwen yet u are gaining, no wonder when there's a good side dere's bound to be an ugly side.

i sacrificed enuff i guess. the long way is fer u to walk. run back the path if u nid me, i will be dere to seek for u. promise me not to get into trouble anymre. promise me. i may seem i din care but i cared i still care. i will be dere. just come to me if u nid me. gimmie time to rest boy. i nid time.

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time wun tell u everything, stop depending on time and go for it. the running track is that fucking long. if u kip standing at the starting point and dun move, u will nv reach the finish line. same goes to life, if u dun do anythin to it u will eventually find urself back to sq one. dun be stupid. carry on and work for it. nv gib out.

this goes to love man. dun waste it.

i wan to dream when i'm nt slpin. i dun wan to dream while slpin. wad's the point if i dream and work towards it ?

i sang with u in the competition, i turned to u and dere u are smiling at me. i wish the time could stp but it went on and i feel tt i can sing along with u. but after the comp everythin was a lie. a big fat lie.we werent tgt at all.

i wan to be optimistic, it's nt easy. it is easy to be a robber than a good citizen. temptation kills. curuosity kills. how can i kill dem before they kill me?

u were falling and i was falling. i promise to catch u once i reach the ground just wait.

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one for all, all for one. leadership qualities.
together we had time, dere fer each other and let's do this right.
we stucked together thus we arrive here together.
UNITED DA VINCI.

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I want you to know
I've never had someone that knows me like you do
the way you do
I've never had somone as good for me as you
no one like you so lonely before i finally found
what i've been looking for

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u may find lately, a lot of things failed u.
but pluck urself up.
it's over why let bygones fill ur hatred and u start hating ppl?
they did all this for one reason.
so u wuld nt get involved and get too upset.
but before u know everything u are angry.

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if u had a bad day. sing a sad song and turn it around.
say HA HA HA. u will find urself stupid and kip laughing. it works.

=) my method may be stupid but yea.

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someone asked me to join STOMP. but i din wan after i tink abt. why make myself famous whr u guys are supporting me huh?
u guys rocks.
STOMP is. err. u noe xia xue?? she's one example. stomp hlp her expand her blog world wide. yea.